One Hundred Heart Beats
by Roguie
Summary: Two people, three lives, and the will to believe in one's own worth. One hundred heart beats is all the time it takes to change the world.


Title: One Hundred Heart Beats

Author: Roguie/ Danae Bowen/ SunSpecOps

Fandom: Primeval

Characters: Connor Temple, Abby Maitland

Rating: K+, at worst a mild T.

Word Count: 1800

Disclaimer: Primeval obviously doesn't belong to me. I just like to borrow the characters and mutate their inner voices. Please don't sue. My house is small, my car is worthless and my dogs are pains in the arse, but they're all I have in the world.

Summary: Two people, three lives, and the will to believe in one's own worth. A hundred heart beats is all the time it takes to change the world.

A/N: So, it's been quite a while since I've played in the Primeval playground, so let's consider this story a shout out to the few of you who may have missed me. :P Great thanks to iEvenstarEstel for the beta! :) Love to all and a Merry Christmas. :)

~~~E~~~

The experience wasn't something he wished he could repeat, but being sucked into an out of control anomaly, chased by future predators, and nearly gassed to death by the poisonous emissions that poured from the earth's surface had earned Connor a little special Abby treatment.

At first it hadn't been cool, not at all. Once she'd gotten over the initial relief at having him home safely, her fists had connected with his chest in a rain of tiny, angry beatings that hadn't so much physically hurt as emotionally stung. The tears that came next weren't the controlled display of sadness he'd seen in that dirty bunker so many years from where they now stood, but tears of panic and desperation, only now free to stream down her face as she'd screamed at him about trying to give up on them. That was the worst; he'd never given up on them, not for a proper second, but on himself? Well, that was a whole other bag of biscuits. Terrifying moments passed where Connor was sure she'd take back her willingness to marry him, having thought better of it on the ride home, her anger and fear building to this point could only drive home the knowledge that he wasn't worth her love. That thought alone gave him pause, allowed him to take her tirade of emotion without reacting, waiting for that moment when she'd turn on her heel and walk out of his life, forever. Not that he'd blame her. Not that it would be a surprise.

Still, when she'd exhausted her need to cry, fight and scream, Connor took her delicate hands in his and raised them to his lips, gently. The promises he made her then were of happiness, loyalty, and forever, though it hadn't gone unnoticed that he never once apologized. No, his actions were his own, his mind clear, the evidence damning. If a moment of weakness caused him to rethink his place on this earth, then so be it.

Much to his relief, when the storm had passed, there was no talk of separation, no blame, no hurtful words that could never be taken back. Her lips met his in a crushing, painful embrace, and he'd melted under her without so much as another word.

Anger had turned to passion and they'd lost themselves that night in rough kisses, scorching touches, and a love that made the heavens explode into the night as nails raked down backs, teeth found hold in flesh, marks were made on skin so slick with sweat that they moved effortlessly against each other. There existed nothing between them but raw need, aching emotion, and a love more pure than the white light that clouded their minds as their bodies came apart and their souls bound together.

It had never been like that, not even in the Cretaceous when every day was an exercise in desperation and every night was spent thinking that it would very likely be their last. So many times they'd almost lost each other, but always at the will of another. This time was different. That night their love was made to reaffirm Connor's life to them both, and later, when he held her against his chest, her breathing even, her body relaxed, his own tears fell silently into the night, cleansing him of the loss he'd very nearly caused, absolving him of the guilt left clouding his heart.

Time passed slowly after that night, as hand in hand they faced the world with new appreciation. They went days between anomalies. They went weeks between dangers. They went months without so much as a ripple in what for all intents and purposes had become the perfect life.

So, they celebrated.

This day had been about Abby, though that didn't stop Connor from enjoying the rewards himself. It was an engagement celebration of sorts, perhaps a bit of a thanks for saving the world celebration, even a slight don't think your job is over just because you stopped one teensy tiny Armageddon celebration. Whatever way one looked at it, it was a celebration of life, and a free room in a hotel they otherwise likely would never afford. Together, they stepped into the penthouse suite of a posh hotel overlooking the Thames, an engagement present from Lester, a weekend alone, away from it all, to be pampered and spoiled by staff trained to do nothing but care for them. He couldn't help himself; when Abby made her excuses and disappeared into the lavish bathroom, he moved to the balcony, watching as the river shone in the moonlight, or perhaps from the fluorescents lighting the Eye, either way, it was beautiful to look out over and ponder.

"Bit of déjà vu, yeah?"

Connor smiled gently as he turned to find Abby behind him, fresh from her shower, a white towel wrapped around her warm, pink skin.

"S'pose so, but it was you on the balcony the last time."

"Don't reckon you're thinking of life in the Cretaceous, either."

He smiled softly and shrugged. "Crossed me mind."

"Regrets?" she asked simply.

"Funny, that," he whispered, turning to take her in his arms, his lips crossing her forehead in a gentle touch. "When I stepped out here I thought I had a million." He sighed into her hair, his arms tightening around her. "Cutter and Sarah. Phillip and New Dawn. Getting us stuck in the Cretaceous." He sniffed out a small sound of irony. "Getting us out of the Cretaceous. Duncan. Tom. Even the bloody diictodons."

Abby listened quietly, to his voice, his heartbeat, sounds that were almost lost in the hum of the city around them. "And now?"

"I've ruined lives, me. Whole entire lives have been wiped off this planet because of something I did. I look at me hands, and there's blood on 'em, Abs. So much blood." He shook his head slowly, tears in his eyes, his throat raw with emotion he hardly knew how to voice. "How do I look in the mirror knowing people are gone because of me?"

"By thinking of the people who're here cause of you, Conn. Me, for one." She paused, taking a deep breath, her own thoughts far from where they should be. "S'pose I should probably say us now, 'cause we're both here because of you." She felt the confusion in his silence, and waited a full three seconds before sighing. "Me and the life we're about to bring into the world, Conn."

"Bring.. life.. Abby?"

She heard his heart miss more than one beat, stuttering back to action with a rhythm neither smooth nor static, but with an excitement born of sheer terror and immediate joy. Life came back to his dark eyes without pause, the lip he'd been worrying between white teeth instantly curving upwards, his arms around her tightening into a vice before almost instantly releasing with a stumbled apology falling off a whispered breath.

She chuckled softly, forcing his arms back around her, her face once again finding its home against his chest. "You can hug me, idiot, I'm not gonna break."

"How… how long've you known?"

She shrugged quietly. "A few days. She's been growing quietly for eight weeks without either of us really realizing she was there. I figured she wouldn't notice if I didn't tell you until the perfect time."

So many emotions played through him in those few, short minutes, stealing his thoughts, catching his breath; so many reactions fled through his body that he was left without words. It really didn't matter, though, not at that very moment, not standing on a balcony in the moonlight, holding his beautiful fiancée, learning about his growing child. The past that meant so much to him a hundred heartbeats before now faded into the background where it belonged, the future that had seemed so bleak fifty short breaths ago now seemed filled with such promise.

He wished he had the words to tell Abby exactly what she'd done for him, exactly what she meant to him, but she was there, secure in the circle of his arms, and he knew he could never vocalize his thoughts well enough for her to understand the depths to which she'd rocked him.

Instead, he pressed his lips to her head, breathing in the scent of her soft hair, tightening his arms just enough to let her know his every thought was of her and their child.

"I love you, Abs," he whispered finally, tears filling his dark eyes, the simple words never enough, but telling her exactly what she needed to hear.

"As if I ever doubted you," she smiled into him, her own crystal tears dampening the fabric of his shirt.

"Love at first sight, yeah?" he chuckled, wryly.

"Yeah," she whispered back. "The moment I really saw you, Conn, really paid attention to the sweet, loyal, amazing guy you've always been… that was the moment I fell in love. I've never looked back and I never will."

"Tell me that in twenty years," he grinned in the darkness.

"So long as you tell me back in forty."

"We'll tell each other in sixty, yeah?" The tears came unbidden, flowing down his face in a stream of emotion without shame. "Nah, how 'bout we just say it every day, instead?" he whispered, his fingers shifting to raise her face to his, raise her lips to his.

"I think that's the best idea you've had yet." Her words were soft, almost lost against his lips as she closed her eyes and let herself be pulled into his kiss, coming apart gently in the warmth of his love.

Some moments were worth every single ounce of pain survived, every battle fought, every loss mourned.

"Will you still love me when I can't see my feet?" Abby grinned against his lips, eyes dancing in the darkness.

"As long as me heart beats, you'll never have to ask,"

~~~Fin~~~~


End file.
